Marriage is often a hot topic among single women, especially since the holidays just ended and the New Year is here. It seems as though the entire world except me has become engaged and is one step closer to the final destination of marriage. However I can’t help but wonder are they heading towards a marriage made in heaven or matrimonial hell? Who is really ready for marriage?
Let’s explore the institution in itself. Marriage can be looked at in the traditional sense and in very modern ways as well. In the traditional and biblical scope of things, marriage is a sacrament, it’s sacred and therefore it is something that should be taken seriously. But is it in these modern times? Or is it just something that people are trying? Long marriages aren’t so prevalent in today’s society. As a young woman, I have some peers who are already on marriage number two and in one instance three. This alone makes me think are we taking it seriously? Or is it just a fad or trend? I also wonder what makes a person truly marriage material?
Traditionally the role of a husband is to be a provider in many ways. This is true because of Adam, it was Adam’s role to cultivate the garden, you can find this reference in Genesis 2:15, we translate this into man being the ultimate provider. Even after the fall in Genesis 3:17 Adam’s role did not change. In our world we acknowledge that the man should be a spiritual and financial provider. When it comes to the woman, Eve is the blueprint, she was made to be a helper, that is clearly defined in Genesis 2:18. In our world, traditionally the woman has held down all of the things in the household and I believe because she came from Adam’s rib, she’s always supposed to be by his side, not by behind him contrary to popular belief.
Man is the provider. Woman is the support system. Simple. Or is it? Contemporary women may in fact accept the man as a provider but there is a fine line between provider and an ATM (All The Man’s Money). Things change, things evolve. Should you marry a man primarily because of his financial status? Does that alone make him prime marriage potential? The woman as a support system can be misconstrued as well. Traditionally we have translated Eve’s role as the one who cooks well, cleans the house, maintains the household and most importantly sticks by the man’s side. However is there a time when a woman is no longer a support system but a doormat instead? Just because a woman sticks around and sticks around and sticks around, does that make her the ultimate wife?
What are the true qualities of a good spouse? Let’s explore the obvious ones.
This one is a no-brainer. No man wants a woman that’s sleeping around and truth be told no woman wants a man that does that either. Women want to feel secure and no one can feel secure with a person who is disloyal. This is a universal truth that everyone knows. Everyone knows this, but still cheating is the number one reason why people break up and many women feel unsecure. If everyone knows this universal truth why is it that so many have twice as many justifications for the opposition of monogamy instead of reasons to remain true?
I believe that reliability is a key asset. That’s one of the reasons why men usually like a woman who is going to take care of home. Chances are if she’s taking care of your living space then she’s reliable in other aspects such as money, health and personal assets. When it comes to women, none of us want a man that we can’t count on. In addition to us wanting you around, we sometimes need you to do things that we may not necessarily want to handle such as servicing the car, fixing things and dealing with the unsavory cable installer.
No one wants someone who’s worshipping the devil or making sacrifices to Satan. You need to serve a higher power, Jesus Christ, Yahweh, Allah or Buddha. An ultimate necessity because no one wants to entrust their life to someone who doesn’t answer to any one other than himself. Chances are if a person is spiritual then they will have your well-being at heart. But one still must be cautious, always. God said to love everyone but put all of your faith and trust in him.
Essentially whether or not a person is marriage material is subjective, it is definitely up for interpretation. Some ideas differ from the ideas of others, but the institution is no joke. No matter who is allowed to get married now, no matter if you don’t identify with the biblical ramifications behind it and you just recognize it as a legal or binding union the fact is that when you marry someone you are placing your life in their hands. If you marry someone then everything that is yours becomes theirs, they now have the right to make medical decisions for you if you are incapacitated, would you want to put your life in the hands of someone who’s disloyal, unreliable and has no sense of morality? Well with all that in mind, you have to ask yourself, are you truly marriage material or not?