Did I Shave My Legs for This?

Greetings all!  I certainly hope that things have been going well for all of you.  In addition, I hope that you enjoyed my last blog post  where I spoke about how society normalizes behavior that is far from normal or even healthy in many aspects. Today’s post somewhat goes deeper into deviant behavior that is not exactly praised but highlighted in our culture, mainly popular and addictive television shows.  It deserves exploration because it is definitely art reflecting reality.  Part of the reasons these shows are so addictive is because it represents a lot of real shit.

Last week, we discussed how the characters in Insecure represented a couple of society’s ills and I still would like to explore this addictive comedy to validate my thinking however I will only reflect on Ms. Molly with today’s post by asking the question, which Molly are you?

First off, let me say, if you aren’t watching Insecure, you are losing.  I am forever grateful for the two men who turned me onto the series last year and it will go down as one of my all-time favorites.  Issa Rae is the bomb and “Issa” is a hot mess that I absolutely adore. Coming from a hot mess who’s wrapped in a blessing, I know exactly what I am talking about.  LOL!  If you do watch the series, you probably saw the latest episode where Molly completed the ultimate no, no….. She had sex with a married man!  Willingly…. He didn’t hide his ring or try to say that his marriage was crumbling, she willingly had sex with a married man.  We all heard that can of worms opening and gasped through that passionate sex scene.

Girl…. Really?  In all fairness, let’s explore Molly’s character and what she represents.  I like to categorize Molly using a trinity, three ways to sum up her character thus far. There’s the Molly from season 1, “the sexually expressive”, hey it sounds much better than hoe.  Then there’s the Molly from the beginning of this season, “the smart Molly” and lastly, thus revealed from last Sunday night, “the hella stupid Molly” who went against her better judgment and you could even see it in the love scene, there was hella apprehension on her face about what the hell she was doing, even though she was enjoying it.  Why is being naughty sometimes sooooo good?

Molly #1, The Sexually Expressive

Last season Molly was all over the place in the dating game.  She had like three dating apps that she was using in order to meet men and she and Issa were trolling clubs looking to “run into” Daniel on Issa’s behalf.  The entire first episode of Season 1 where Issa rapped “Broken Pussy” may have been the springboard to send poor Molly into a downward spiral of sexual exploration with numerous men.  In fact, the last episode of the first season ended with Molly bedding a man-child who was so out of sorts with the entire notion of a one-night stand that the poor dear asked should he turn on some music and could barely get his pants down to his ankles before Molly was on him like white on rice.  

Are you that Molly?  The Molly who used sex to prove that she had some kind of control over her life, especially when she and Issa had a disagreement about how none of the guys she picks are good enough.  Issa made a valid point last season when she said that Molly had impossible standards that she held to each of the hopefuls that she dated.  But it seemed as though Molly was very misguided during season one as many of us are when we’re jumping in and out of bed with random guys for whatever reason.  Thank God she’s smart enough not to let anything damaging happen like getting knocked up or getting an STD despite the fact that we haven’t witnessed many condom wrappers in the series.  We will assume that such an educated and independent woman has the good sense and smart fortune to invest in Trojans.  The lesson that we could all stand to learn from “The sexually expressive Molly” is that she was no more fulfilled with each encounter than when she started with the numerous bedfellows that she’s shared with.  Sex cannot fulfill us unless it’s with someone special.  It’s not brain surgery, we all know this.  Don’t go looking for a meaningful relationship through animalistic encounters.

Molly #2 The Smart Girl

As season two of Insecure began we all got a chance to see a more focused and intelligent Molly who had an agenda of advancement in the workplace and accepting responsibility for her actions by attending therapy to work out her issues.  We were all rooting for this Molly because it seemed as though Issa was starting to lose her damn mind a bit and we all know that it’s not healthy when both besties are screwed up, someone has to have their shit together or else the entire situation will go down in flames.  We can all remember a time when we were a hot mess and our gal pal was a fucking mess too and next thing you know you were in need for reinforcements.  No one wants that.  Even though it makes for good television, deep down inside we’re looking at entertainment for some truth and guidance when the world is just too much.  Right now we’re living in Trump’s country so we all need a release as much as possible.  The momentum with this Molly was building as she was branching out to colleagues in Chicago and helping Issa to move on but lo and behold before we knew it, familial ties and nostalgic relationships from high school blew that progress to shit.  I’ve always said that going down memory lane is a tricky trip that if you’re not careful can lead you towards some bad ass decisions.  What we could all learn from this Molly is to stay smart and don’t let other’s bad judgment like Dro’s open marriage deter us from building on the progress started.  Never take four steps up and then allow someone else to knock you two steps backwards, willingly.

Molly #3 Hella Stupid

Come on, we all knew that she was going to let Dro get some eventually.  Come on, her latest date was hella dry, hella boring and she wasn’t feeling him at all.  Not to mention Dro is hella sexy and he knows her, a lot of the guess work is already complete here.  We could see that Molly was feeling Dro.  But one does wonder just why was she feeling him?  Was she feeling him because he represented her childhood or was it because he was already taken by someone else?  As much as I hate to admit it, there is a devilish allure to a man who’s doing right by another black woman.  It’s a sad truth.  We all have looked at a married man who’s taking care of home and gotten a little moist at his presence because we want the same.

But the smart woman dismisses those ideas especially if he’s coming on to you.  Because when you act on such you’re becoming a cliche and a home wrecker at that.  No one wants to be a side piece.  It doesn’t even sound appealing.  We’re all sitting back and waiting to see what we can learn from this Molly but I’m quite sure this lesson will be a hard lesson learned because I cannot see how this will turn out well.  But who knows?  The only thing I can tell you is that I’ve never heard of a happy result after having sex with a married individual.  Sometimes I wonder if the encounter is even worth it.  We saw how Dro was putting in work on Molly but through her orgasmic facial expressions there was hella apprehension and contemplation on her face all because she knows that it’s wrong and she knows the fall out is bound to be terrible.  Also Molly was being hella hypocritical for even sleeping with Dro in the first place after getting mad that her father didn’t live up to her romanticized version of the ideal husband, after stepping out on her mom.  This is the classic conundrum though.  You get mad at someone for doing something stupid and then you go out and do something stupid as well.  Hmmmm….. I guess we’ll all be watching tonight and for the remainder of the season to see what happens when hella stupid Molly has to live with what she’s done.

Which Molly are you right now?  Are you sexually expressive and using such actions to navigate through life?  If so, be responsible and just know it’ll probably pass.  Are you the smart Molly?  If so, stay that way.  Continue to progress in that direction and don’t let any devil invade your space and sway you from that way?  And if you’re the hella stupid Molly, do everything you possibly can not to stay that way for too long.

Today is a special day.  Today is the birthday of my best friend to whom I pay tribute to in every single blog post.  My dear, dear friend EJ.  He would’ve been 32 on today.  Last year we lost him before his 31st birthday and each day has been a struggle for all of us to deal with his loss.  For me it’s difficult because he was one of those few friends that I had that never judged my diversity, he embraced it.  He understood that I was different and he never ever tried to get me to conform to the box that so many wanted to shove me into.  It’s rare that a father has a best friend, and then his daughter becomes best friends with his son, but I did.  With that I feel blessed and I feel a deep sense of responsibility.  Because of such, know that as long as there is breath in my body and I have means to do so, your family will always have me.  Rest in love brother, I hope you’ve had a great celebration in heaven and tell Papi I said be good. 

SMOOCHES!