We singles have an image in our heads of the perfect man or woman whether we’re looking for that special person or not.  For me it’s a man who brings as much to the table as I do and who looks at me like Barack looks at Michelle.  Every young woman or man has an idea of what they want but I wonder is it truly what we really claim to want?

I am reminded of a situation that asks the same question.  Kyle is a great guy and he has a lot to bring to the table in the form of intellect and charisma while his pockets are lagging.  His lack of economic security is understandable for the average college student in their twenties.  I personally believe that college is an important part of one’s life where they explore and grow and then afterwards the financial portions begin to fall in place.  Because Kyle is financially struggling he desires a woman who isn’t all about the Benjamins and who is willing to grow and explore with him as well.  Kyle’s outlook is very realistic and refreshing because  the average young and single man is only looking at  the superficial.

One day to his surprise he meets Ava.  Ava is a college student as well however her financial status is a lot better off than his because she’s an only child and has a position within her family’s company while attending school.  Because Ava has all of this to offer she isn’t really interested in an affluent guy instead she just wants someone genuine and someone she can talk to.  Ava is beautiful, sweet, caring and emotionally available and Kyle becomes smitten with her quickly.

Months pass and Ava and Kyle are in complete bliss.  They can talk to each other, they enjoy each other and they share together.  From a spectator’s view it would seem as though everything is great right?  Wrong.  One day out of the clear blue Kyle starts acting weird.  He starts to call less, his text messages grow shorter and more reserved and this peculiar behavior has Ava confused.  Ava handles this by taking the direct approach and asks Kyle about his shady behavior and out of the blue Kyle breaks up with her.

The question is why?  Why did Kyle break up with the physical embodiment of the desires that he expressed on a regular basis?  His dream was staring him right in the face but he let it go.  Why?  I believe that Kyle like a lot of singles was hindered by fear.  Most of the time we think that if something’s too good to be true than it usually is but sometimes that just isn’t the case.  Even though I haven’t found the perfect man for me yet I won’t be hindered by fear because I’m the creme of the crop!

So do we truly want what we claim to desire?  Perhaps we don’t truly want what’s best for us?  Perhaps when Kyle was faced with the real deal he cowered and decided that instead of getting the creme of the crop he’ll take the bruised plum hanging on the weakest limb of the tree.  Believe it or not but a situation such as Kyle and Ava’s  is much more common than you know.  Fear is a powerful force whether we’d like to admit it or not however I don’t believe that it should stand in the way of happiness.

Many men are like Kyle and when they’re given the exact person that he claims to want they usually run for the hills but later on realize the error in their ways however by then it’s too late.  So I ask what do you truly want?  Do you want the female who has her life together who only wants to love and support you or do you want the exact opposite?  I suggest you figure it out before you break another heart or lose the perfect mate to someone who has their act together.